I woke up last night at around 3 and really had a hard time going back to sleep. This is nothing unusual for me, but what was unusual was that there was one particular thing on my mind. So, a couple of hours later, I got up and I emailed my Dad, who lives a couple of hours away. I want to show you what I sent him:Dad,
We’re doing this series at church called ’30 Days to Live’ and it’s based on Psalm 39, especially verses 4-5:
"Show me, O Lord, my life's end
and the number of my days;
let me know how fleeting is my life.
You have made my days a mere handbreadth;
the span of my years is as nothing before you.
Each man's life is but a breath.”
We’re exploring the question “What would you do differently if you knew you only had 30 days left to live? And since you don’t know, shouldn't’t you do those things now?” As David put it in Psalm 39, basically, Life is Short! He plead with God to remind him that life is short so that he would not take a day for granted.
This series has been profound for me. There are some things I need to do differently.
I feel compelled to just ask you to think about something. I know it’s hard, and I know it creates complications and I know it’s short notice. But when was the last time your 3 boys were all in the same place together, with your other 3 grandchildren and the one Jeremy [my brother] now has on the way? This is a unique chance to spend time with us in a way that happens very rarely, if ever. Jeremy and Jason and I would be so glad to see you, to eat with you and to enjoy Thanksgiving with you. We have plenty of food and plenty of room if you want to stay the night.
I wish you would think about it. We’re planning to eat at 2:00, but if we knew you were coming, we would change the time.
Love,
Brian
My parents divorced 30 years ago and, to the best of my knowledge, have never eaten Thanksgiving dinner together at the same table since. But this series, and this scripture, has affected me. So, we didn't hear from Dad and we didn't set a place for him, but at about ten minutes to 2, I looked up from the game of pool that my daughter and my brother and I were shooting, and there was my Dad, pulling into my driveway. I couldn't believe it. None of us could.
As we sat down to eat, we talked about how this was the first time in more than 10 years that all three of us brothers had shared Thanksgiving with our Dad. And I quietly pondered the significance my Mom and Dad both sharing that meal for the first time in three decades.
As my Dad left, he thanked my Mom for the meal and told her that the food was good. I can't help but feel that slowly, (painfully slowly) time has healed old wounds and God has softened hardened hearts. Psalm 39 is a profound teaching that should affect us all...if we would only listen. I'm glad I did.
Posted by Brian C. Hughes, Senior Pastor
5 comments:
WOW! That's what it is all about. I am proud of you and even more proud of your father. That's a big step after all that time. It's easy to just say well, we just don't do that anymore and not try to change. So, I am so glad you had a wonderful Thanksgiving with all of your family. God Bless.
Well, this made me cry.
Surprise.
Thanks for sharing this. It was truly a blessing...I agree with Karen, what a big step.
Yay!
I must thank you as well for sharing this, wow.. so powerful. As soon as I heard your first message in church on this I new of some things I needed to accomplish and when church was over the first thing I did was make sure my children new exactly why I am always proud of them and then I made a couple of phone calls to a few people that have helped me become who I am and have assisted in molding me into a much better person.
wow.
This is what life is all about. I love that you don't just preach it...you live it. Thank you for setting the example.
I won't lie-I teared up. Shocker. :)
Brian, you are to be commended for your heart to have your family together for Thanksgiving. I believe, even more than your attempt, that your Dad should be commended for the huge step he took to accept your invitation and bring the family together for the first time in decades.
Sadly though, not all reconciliation attempts are accepted. I know that my relationship with my parents will not be resolved any time soon. I have made those steps over the decades for family reconciliation but to no avail. Each time I approach my parents, they say that nothing is wrong, but their actions speak volumes more than their words. They have not attempted to have a relationship with my children, who are now grown with families of their own. I don't know if it's right, but after all of my attempts, I believe that I have to step back and allow God to soften their hearts before reconciliation will truly take place. Not shutting them out, but just stepping back.
Your Dad took a giant step, swallowed his pride, and made Thanksgiving 2008 a day that your family will be truly thankful for. May God bless you all for many more family gatherings.
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