Thursday, January 12, 2012
A sad, sad day...and a Call to Action
Yesterday, the parent company to Hostess - the beloved maker of Twinkies and Cupcakes - filed for bankruptcy. It's the 3rd time they've filed for bankruptcy since 2004, and there is speculation that they will take their final breath this time.
Which means we might take our final bite sometime soon.
I grew up on Twinkies. They were sometimes in my lunch as a single pack, sometimes as a two-for. Sometimes, I'd sneak an extra pack without Mom knowing it. Twinkies have a shelf life of like ten-thousand years and fend off radiation, bacteria, cancer and other diseases (so I've heard). They float in the harshest of soft drinks without falling apart, unlike their counterfeit, substandard rivals.
There is nothing like a Twinkie. So lets do something about it.
My fellow Americans, we need to rescue the Twinkie! It could be the most important issue in this next presidential election. For all the money the government wastes, couldn't we spend a few million saving a national treasure? Better yet, let us take matters into our own hands. Let us rise up to the occasion and speak with one voice through commerce!
Let us, this day, show the world how much we love our golden cakes with mysterious white filling. I'm going to buy some right now!
It could be my last.
Who's with me!?